I’ve noticed this fascinating thing about the folks I work with.
And I’ve noticed it about myself, too:
The services we offer our people have both an outer aspect (the tangible, often external result) and an inner aspect (the internal work that makes the external result possible).
And whatever the outer aspect is, the inner aspect we guide our people through always reflects our own Great Inner Work—that beautiful, challenging journey we find at the heart of our own personal evolution.
Have you noticed this?
What I also see, is how often this brings up feelings of imposter syndrome:
“I’m guiding clients through inner stuff that I myself still struggle with, and it makes me feel like a fraud. Who am I to coach them through this when I haven’t mastered it myself?”
This is what I’m gonna address today, in a way that both challenges you and inspires you.
Let’s dive in.
Becoming The One
Here’s the challenging part:
If you’ve got a message and a service that points your people toward some kind of inner work, it is absolutely essential that you’re doing this work in yourself as well.
Otherwise you’re just full of hot air.
I’ve seen plenty of solopreneurs (primarily coaches) using their work with clients as a way of unconsciously bypassing their own inner work—i.e., “if I’m helping others do it, I never have to actually do it myself”.
This is problematic for multiple reasons, but the main one is: if you’re not actively doing the work in yourself, you’re gonna have all kinds of blindspots that diminish your ability to help people.
You’re gonna be leading them through a process that has nuances and obstacles you have no direct experience with, which will require you to essentially “help” from a space of pure theory—and that’s no bueno.
That said…
You don’t have to be a fully-realized master to lead and guide others.
When you’re actively doing your own Great Work, you’re operating from a space of knowledge, experience, and wisdom. And you’re continually learning and evolving, because you value who you’ve become—and who you’re becoming—as a result of it.
It’s good to realize:
There is no mountain top. There is no “there” to get to, where you’ve learned it all and fully mastered the Great Work.
You’ll always be a student on the way, just like your people.
It’s enough that you’ve chosen and committed to doing this work in yourself, and it’s good to recognize that it’ll be a lifelong thing you’re continually expanding into.
This doesn’t make you an imposter or a fraud—it makes you human. And you can recognize that you have valuable leadership, guidance, insights, and wisdom to offer your people as they do their own version of this work in themselves, on the way to achieving the result they initially came to you for help with.
This means giving yourself the benefit of being someone who is growing and evolving. It means giving yourself a break for not being perfectly self-actualized yet.
And y’know… it’s OK for you to let your people see that you’re human, too.
I promise you: they can handle it.
Forget portraying that shiny brand image of perfection, and think about how openly sharing your own personal evolution could make you more relatable and trustworthy to your people—while also relieving you of the burden of wearing a mask, just to be perceived as more (or different) than you truly are.
Share your wisdom and your struggles. Let it all be part of your message and your work.
Trust that where you are, right now, is just right.
And let the Great Work you’re doing in You speak volumes to your people about what could be possible for them… and why you’re just The One to guide them into it.
Stay gold. I love you.
See ya next Wednesday.
–Daniel
